Finding Peace and Respect During Unplanned Pregnancy
Navigating an unexpected pregnancy presents numerous challenges, as my husband and I learned firsthand when I became pregnant in college.
Newly married and wrapping up our college studies, we were surprised but excited about starting our family.
Armed with the health insurance plan we bought through our college, we called our local hospital to establish care with an OBGYN. When the doctor’s office informed me I would need to have my pregnancy confirmed by bloodwork before they could schedule my appointment, I thought, no problem. But that’s when the trouble began.
When I went to the university health center for the bloodwork, I learned that the policy the school offered students and that we were paying for monthly did not cover pregnancy care at all and would not cover the pregnancy test I needed.
“But don’t worry,” they told me, “It covers abortion in full.”
In short, the university refused to give me the pregnancy test I needed to get an OB appointment, and the OB refused to see me without the test. I was stuck in a never-ending loop with no clear way out. No matter how many times I told the provider that we wanted to keep our child and that under no circumstance would I seek an abortion, they continually counseled us to choose abortion. It was covered by the insurance, and since I was young, I would have plenty of time to have other children later on, they argued. I was appalled by their disregard for both the life of my child and my desire to protect his life.
A free clinic we contacted also tried to pressure us into an abortion, saying we were too young to have a child. They also refused to provide us a pregnancy test.
Frustrated and desperate for a solution, we began to pray. And that’s when we found Your Loving Choices (YLC), a local pregnancy care center where I found peace, assurance and respect for our decision to give birth to our son. I got the test I needed there and finally found staff who were committed to walking alongside me and supporting our decision. Finally, someone listened instead to what we wanted to do instead of telling us what we had to do.
Throughout my pregnancy, I met with a coach at the center who taught me about being a parent and told me what to buy for when the baby arrived. They also told us about grants where I could receive prenatal vitamins and a pack-n-play. Most important, they shared that in the state of Pennsylvania, every expecting mother can receive insurance coverage if she is not otherwise covered, and that included pregnancy care.
It’s because of the pregnancy center that I was able to deliver my son, Michael, six weeks before my husband and I graduated from college. While Michael spent some time in the NICU and underwent surgery, they called us and sent us gift cards so we could afford gasoline to visit him every day. It was not easy, but their support was critical to our success. In fact, we now have four healthy children, between six and 16 years of age, and I have a fulfilling career as a nurse practitioner in family practice.
As a nurse, I’ve seen countless patients who would benefit from exactly what pregnancy centers have to offer and reminded me of the help we received. So when YLC opened an office in my hometown I began volunteering there. Through the pregnancy testing, STD testing, free ultrasounds, counseling, guidance and other support and resources they offer, women are finding the attentive care and brighter futures I know firsthand that they crave.
Two years ago when YLC asked me to join their board, it was an easy yes for me. Coming full circle, today I now serve as president of the board of the very same organization that once provided me with the critical support I needed. And my message to expecting mothers of all ages and life circumstances is that even when all the paths seem to lead nowhere and fear and uncertainty overpower your hope, there is always another way, and you are never alone.
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